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October 03, 2005
No No Manolo
Everybody loves Le Manolo. And why not? The No Poncho Pledge. The love of shoes. The eye for the pretty and not so pretty. But Elka does not love le Manolo. Manolo does not love Elka. Its mutual. Why does Elka not love Manolo? Because Manolo does not seem to realize that some women sit at home almost all the time and have no reason for 'the forceful business striding [which] would best be done in the highest of heels, so that you may tower Godzilla-like over your pitiable coworkers, who will quail before your awsome majesty' Nor does Manolo seem to realize that some of these women have size 7WWW feet and couldn't wear the highest or prettiest of feminine shoes even should they have occasion for forceful striding. Now Elka has worn, for 20 years now, Birkenstocks. The self same Birkenstocks which are housed in the Gallery of Horrors Elka was also very pleased with herself when she discovered Earth shoes which somehow, despite being half the width of Birkenstocks, fit her feet and look a 100 times more streamlined and thus 100 times more feminine. But alas Le Manolo has relegated these shoes to the Gallery. So Elka has gone shoe shopping. She picked out some cute Haflinger shoes which had to come home with her simply because they had sheep on them. She also picked up some Haflinger shoes not on their website that are ballerina flats embellished with a strap made of felted flowers. Elka feels these they are very cute and need only a Felted Tweed and Kid Silk Haze Elfin cardigan to look ooo la la. Elka sits back and awaits her choices being sent to the Gallery again. Elka, still on a quest for cute shoes, picked out some Born Hickory shoes despite Elka's mother stating that they looked as if one needed to muck out the stables while wearing said shoes. Elka's mother, at the tender age of 60, is often seen in rediculously hidious shoes such as the platform mule. Elka votes her mother a nonsensical person who has no business stating what another should place on her feet. Still Elka admits Hickory is not the most feminine of shoes and eyes the cutie Born Torus or maybe she should channel her inner Jon Cryer with Think! Shoes Cookie #81080-42 Why Jon instead of Molly? The Earth shoes were Molly and those were Horrors. A little gender bending might save Elka from Manolo. Or maybe she just needs to shell out for some Beautifeels......
Posted by Elka at 10:08 PM | Comments (3)